At 8-1/2 months, Baby Champuru likes to think she is all grown up. She has been able to pull herself into a standing position since she was 7 months old. Now, she’s trying to take steps. Usually, she’ll clutch my fingers in her tiny fists and take a few steps toward me. Every so often though, she’ll start feeling brave and will let go of my fingers — or if I’m holding her by the waist, she’ll try to push my hands away. Of course, she’s not ready to walk without support, so she’ll stand for a moment or two, try to take a step, then lose her balance and plop on her bottom. But she isn’t easily deterred and will keep practicing. At this rate, I suspect she’ll be walking well before her first birthday.
She also likes to attempt feeding herself. Whether it’s fighting for the spoon, bottle, or the cup, Baby Champuru’s fast hands are a challenge to avoid. With the introduction of baby rice crackers, self-feeding has become one of her favorite activities, allowing herself to control what, when, and how much goes in her mouth. She’s getting much better about regulating how much she bites off now and hasn’t had a choking episode since we first introduced the finger food.
The girl is headstrong and I’m sure we’ll be in for some interesting challenges and triumphs as she grows older. It’s already apparent that she will not be forced into doing anything she has set her mind against. We have had to find ways to work around her: distraction, rolling with it, etc. This includes simple things like sitting in the tub, changing her diaper or clothes, sitting down in her swing/car seat/high chair, or even nursing when she isn’t in the mood. Docile, this child is not. But it’s also this determination that may someday make her very successful at whatever she sets her mind to.
It makes me ponder my views on discipline. As parents, it’s our duty to guide our children along the right path — teaching them to be good people and keeping them out of harm’s way. Of course, there are extremes on the definition of discipline as evidenced in Dr. William Sears’ The Discipline Book: How to Have a Better-Behaved Child From Birth to Age Ten
(suggests alternatives to spanking) and Dr. James Dobson’s The New Strong-Willed Child
(spare the rod, spoil the child). I like to think that there’s a happy medium. Of course, without having read either of the books yet, I can’t say for sure but as much as I love Dr. Dobson, I find myself leaning more toward the attachment parenting philosophy of Dr. Sears. Hubby, on the other hand, was no stranger to the belt as a consequence for misbehaving and the phrase, “wait until your father gets home” was often employed. He feels we should use the “good cop/bad cop” method: “you can do things mom’s way or the hard way. You choose.”
I don’t recall my father ever giving me a spanking, but I know my mom did on occasion. I tell Hubby (the recipient of many spankings) half-jokingly that I didn’t get spanked (much) because I was such a good child. I can only remember one incident when I was probably preschool-age, my mom chased me around the livingroom with a flimsy plastic ruler and whacked me on the leg. Of course, the sting was more emotional than physical since the force of the spanking probably wouldn’t have maimed a housefly. I burst into tears and muttered “sorry” in between sobs for whatever transgression I was guilty of at the time. Five minutes later, my tears had dried and I was playing happily again. It didn’t take a beating with a belt to make me realize my wrongdoing and obey, but then again, I probably wasn’t what one would consider a strong-willed child. I really hope that I won’t have to resort to spanking to effect discipline in our household. Maybe I’m being naïve, but I guess only time will tell.
How do you discipline your child?
