No, I’m not confessing my aspirations of being a UFC champion. But, last night, I did dream that Hubby and I were supposed to participate in amateur mixed martial arts (MMA) fights.

Friends and family were in the stands and excitement was in the air. People were wishing me well and instead of getting psyched up, I was starting to get cold feet. I walked by a poster featuring the women’s bouts and I saw my competition. Massively huge women, if you could call them that, scary, steroid-inspired muscle-bound meanies scowling at the camera, their glares jumped off the page and down my throat. Then, there was my photo, my cheesy smile stuck out like a sore thumb.

“Oh my gosh, these women could knock me out and kill me,” I thought. I imagined myself being hit with the force of a wrecking ball and never waking up. Then, I determined that I had to forfeit my fight, wave the white flag, anything to get out of the pummeling I was sure to receive.

I sought out Hubby who was also getting ready for his fight. He looked like he was in top shape and ready to rumble. Other fighters were taping up their knuckles and shadow boxing in front of the mirrors.

“I can’t do it, Hubby,” I told him, feeling like a major cop-out.

“Don’t worry, you don’t have to. No one is forcing you to go through with it. Just find the ref and tell him you’re forfeiting. It shouldn’t be a problem,” he hugged me tightly and I knew that he loved me no matter what: wuss or not.

I can feel the beginnings of a sore throat coming on. It’s itchy and slightly sore now. I don’t know how that’s even possible when I’m on prenatal vitamins which we all know have the ability to protect you against every communicable disease known to man.

Before IVF, I would immediately take Airborne to maim a cold by whacking its kneecaps with a baseball bat called “vitamin C.” Airborne contains highly excessive amounts of vitamin C and other herbal goodies which make me leery about taking it, now that I’m monitoring every little thing that goes in my mouth. So, instead, I’m resorting to drinking a couple more glasses of orange juice a day and getting more rest. Is it possible to sleep more than the 9-10 hours I’m already getting a night? Maybe I can bore this cold to death.

I had another dream about losing my teeth. This time it was only one and it was due to biting a Kal Bi bone, and not attending to it right away. Five months, to be exact. It was loose for all that time, until finally it just fell out.

Fast-forward to the next scene: I was at the dentist’s office. The waiting room was full of people, screaming kids, and old men falling asleep in their chairs. I had been there for hours, waiting to be seen as I held my freshly fallen tooth in the palm of my hand and my tongue kept wandering to the new gap between my teeth. The tooth was hollow, as if everything on the inside just rotted away. Root and all. I was mortified about having lost my tooth and felt stupid about not seeing the dentist sooner. Mom was sitting in the waiting room next to me, I was in high school.

Then, to make matters worse, I had to use the restroom. Badly. The receptionist gestured to a hallway and instructed me that it was the second door on the right. When I got there, it was the most disgusting restroom I had ever seen. No doors and no toilet seats; scary, dim lighting. Every single toilet (there were three) had crap all over it, but nature was calling. Screaming, actually. Of course, toilet seat covers were not available, but luckily, an ample amount of tissue were on hand. I started layering the toilet with sheets of paper, but everything kept seeping through the tissue. I kept layering and layering… I wondered if I could hover my butt over the toilet without allowing anything to touch my skin… layering and layering… meanwhile, my stomach is gurgling and I have to make a decision soon…

It was truly a nightmare, champuru style. A vivid one.

I’m sure this is old news to regular patrons of the local library, but for the rest of us who normally get our reading material from the likes of Borders and Barnes & Noble, you’d be surprised to see just how much the Hawaii public library system has changed. It’s been years since I last darkened the doorway of a library. (Remember those card files using the Dewey Decimal System? Yeah.) But, let me preface this by saying that this has nothing to do with books.

Today’s mission was to find a Frank Delima DVD for a project at work. (Don’t ask.) Arnold, the library enthusiast did a search using their online catalog and found that the Salt Lake library was the only one with the DVD I needed, in stock. So, off to the library I went.

When I walked in to the library, it felt distant yet familiar. The morgue-like silence, the cool, completely dehumidified air, people speaking in hushed tones, the rustling of pages… I wanted to stay here forever. I think missed my calling. I should have been a librarian. But that’s totally off the topic here.

What I found was a treasure trove of DVD’s. It almost made me take my Blockbuster card out of my wallet and kick it to the curb: new releases, old classics, and *drum roll please* a martial arts section that would put Blockbuster to shame. (Seriously, Blockbuster, you call that a martial arts section? Talk about lame.)

Sure, I knew the library had DVD’s for rent, but I thought they only had a limited (and lame) selection of stuff that I’d never want to watch, even at the bargain rental cost of $1 for a 7-day rental. Boy, was I wrong. Apparently, in addition to the great selection of other film genres, martial arts is a specialty of the Salt Lake Library’s DVD section. I didn’t have time to browse, but I did notice that they even had a four-part instructional series on Shotokan karate, which is the art that I practice.

And, Bae Yong Joon fans, you are not to be left out. According to Arnold, who is the compendium of information, the McCully library specializes in Korean dramas.

So, dust off that library card and check it out. You might be surprised at what you find at your local public library.

With parenthood on the horizon and a good chance for multiples, Hubby and I recently added the Discovery Channel show Jon & Kate plus 8 to our DVR and we watched the first episode last night.

“I don’t know if I want to watch this,” Hubby said, before hitting the PLAY button on the remote. “I think it might scare me.”

Hubby braved the possible emotional trauma and watched the 30-minute episode with me. To see how Kate manages to keep sanity in a household of ten is just mind-boggling. I think I’d have issues with just two. Scratch that. It would be challenging enough with just ONE. But, man, oh man, that woman has EIGHT kids under the age of 10, six of them under 5. I don’t know how they do it. I’ll be watching every episode with particular interest.

But what I want to know is how she managed to carry sextuplets. Oh, my goodness. That is one strong woman!

As for me, I don’t think I can handle sextuplets. Or even quadruplets. Triplets, questionable. Twins, maybe. One would be just perfect. But, we’ll have to see what the Lord has in store for us. I just want the Snowflake(s), no matter how many, to be healthy and strong. Prayers still appreciated!

We discovered that Hubby will be taking a short business trip that will keep him from being present for my first ultrasound. I called the doctor’s office to see if I could reschedule it for earlier in the week, but the nurse said that February 1st was the earliest we could do it. Apparently, timing is everything in this business, so it would have to be February 1. Or later.

Come on. Are you kidding me? There is no way I’m going to opt for later. I’m already going nuts as I count the days until February 1.

According to this website, it says that with IVF, you calculate pregnancy by counting from two weeks prior to your egg retrieval. In my case, my egg retrieval was done in August 2007, so that would make me 5 months pregnant! (Just kidding!) As you know, my beautiful embryos were frozen, which is why I call them “Snowflakes”. In a normal IVF cycle, I believe the embryo transfer takes place about 3 days after the egg retrieval. So, that would make January 1, 2008 my theoretical egg retrieval date. Two weeks prior to that is December 18. So, according to that calculation, that would make me 7 weeks pregnant. It doesn’t quite make sense to me, but I’ll have to ask my doc about that.

I don’t feel pregnant, necessarily, just fat. For some reason when I talked to the nurse this morning and she said that they would be scanning for the fetal heartbeat, it gave me a mild panic attack and I’m not even sure why. Scary thoughts flooded my mind and it took me a while to dismiss them. Scary thoughts on both sides of the spectrum: what if they hear 4+ sets of heartbeats… or what if…

I need to stop being such a pessimistic worry wart. God has always brought us through, never giving us more than we can handle. I keep having to remind myself about that, especially now while our lives are awash with uncertainty.

Since I started my in vitro cycle, and subsequently after I found out I was pregnant, I had been advised not to take any medications, including over-the-counter drugs like Excedrin or Alleve. Unfortunately, I am prone to tension headaches and occasionally get a particularly bad migraine. On Saturday afternoon, I felt a tension headache coming on. Knowing that I would not be able to to turn to drugs as a remedy, I decided to try stretching.

I bought the book, Instant Relief: Tell Me Where it Hurts and I’ll Tell You What to Do months ago, but it’s been sitting on my shelf, collecting dust. The premise of this book is that by stretching the proper muscles, you can effectively reduce or eliminate your pain. I thought it was worth a try, so I dusted off the book and began doing the stretches recommended for tight neck and shoulder muscles.

After about 10 minutes, I felt significantly better, and avoided a tension headache that could have kept me from dinner with friends.

Perhaps I should keep that book on my nightstand and practice the stretches daily. If it can keep my muscles loose, maybe I can avoid migraines altogether. That would be wonderful.