I put in my leave papers today. I’m taking off from January 2-11, 2008.
I’m making comprehensive notes for my replacement, because I am definitely going to be UNREACHABLE during those two weeks. After all, I’m directed to be on bed rest — which means I’m supposed to be resting — and not thinking about work. I intend to make work the farthest thing from my mind during the period while I’m encouraging the snowflakes to attach themselves to my uterus.
Whenever people hear that I’m going on leave, they ask me if I’m traveling somewhere. Vegas? Japan? No, Kapiolani Hospital. Then, I feel compelled to spill the entire story about going through in vitro fertilization, yada-yada-yada. There’s a measure of anxiety about telling people about the procedure. It’s almost akin to telling people that you’re pregnant before the end of your first trimester. Because, what if… you know. What if.
But then again, I’ve been blogging about it all this time, so what’s the difference? I guess I just don’t want to be known at the office as the “girl who can’t have kids” should the procedure not be successful.
I know it’s silly. And, where the heck is my faith? I know that whatever happens it’s because there is a reason. I am hopeful that the Lord will bless us with a child and so I’ll continue to pray everyday for those little snowflakes until they’re transfered to my womb where they’ll hopefully take a liking to it. So much so that I can carry them to term and give birth to healthy and happy bab(ies). Multiples are a good possibility, but I’ll be overjoyed with just one. In fact, I don’t know if I can handle more than one! But, God knows how much we can handle and won’t give us more than that.
The countdown begins. As long as my next two appointments go well, in just over two weeks, the snowflakes and I will be reunited. Let’s hope I can make them cozy enough to make them want to stick around.
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Snowflakes are my frozen embryos which are currently being stored in a lab somewhere, awaiting to be transferred to me on January 4, 2008.
